Help wanted Please! For my book on British saints

 I am writing an illustrated book on British saints, for every day of the year. 

I am hoping to illustrate it as much as possible and I ask anyone with a camera to take any photos of shrines, any associated wells, stained glass windows, churches etc, to please send me any photos with the associated saint's name. Anything will be considered including pencil drawings and old prints.

In return I will put your name (with your approval) in my acknowledgments page.

If you would like to contribute, please email me at - domstemp@gmail.com

I am hoping to publish it in 2024.

Many thanks for your help.

August Bank Holiday pilgrimage from Wells Cathedral to Glastonbury Abbey 28th August

 ukmasses.com   Has details of the pilgrimage on Monday 28th August. It’s free. The only cost is £7.50, which covers entry to Glastonbury Abbey

The walk starts from Wells Cathedral at 10am and finishes at 3pm at Glastonbury Abbey. Mass will be said by Father Morgan in the Lady Chapel at the abbey.

The website has a map and places where you can join en-route.

The masses are in Latin and follow the pre 1960 rite.

The Masses do not mention so called Pope Francis, as it is thought by many that he’s a heretic.

No need to book, just turn up!

The website also gives details of all the pre 1960 Latin masses in the UK, which are growing. They are not in communion with the occupant in the Vatican. All the priests are properly ordained in the proper rite, NOT the dubious rite which Paul 6th intruoduced in around 1969.

See you there

My First Stalking Holiday in Scotland

 MY FIRST STALKING TRIP

In mid October 2005 my husband persuaded me to go on a 3-day stalking holiday to Scotland, which was organised by a great friend of ours, who took a week in Ben Armine Lodge every year. The Victorian sporting lodge is situated on the Sutherland Estate in the Northern Scottish Highlands, where red deer live amongst the heather-clad hills overlooking the Black Water River. The lodge was built in 1863 and also caters for hill walking, bird watching expeditions and fishing.

Not being a particularly country girl, I thought it sounded fun because there would be no cooking, cleaning or  laundry  and plenty of walking which is one of the few exercises I enjoyed. I was strongly advised to buy proper waterproof clothing and decent boots, so  I bought a sage green Laksen outfit, which was waterproof trousers and a jacket. It’s still going strong 16 years later. 

We flew to Inverness and hired a Land Rover Defender. After an hour’s drive we got to the private 8-mile long stony drive, which took a bumpy 30 minutes to get to the lodge as it was extremely rough. Our friend had already been at the lodge for a few days and had organised all the suppers and alcohol like a military operation and a wonderful home cook was hired, who was married to the deerstalker. They lived in a separate part of the lodge. As well as cooking, the lovely Linda prepared cooked breakfasts, made the beds, cleaned the common areas and lit the fire.

Most nights there was a roast because the next day the leftover meat was used for the ‘piece’ which was a large filled bap to take on the hill, together with fruit cake  from the House of Bruar and a Mars Bar.

We had an excellent roast beef on our first night, with wonderful wines from the Wine Society. The dining room was snug and cosy with tartan carpet and matching chairs and curtains.

The next morning I got ready into my new kit, including a thermal vest and polo neck jumper - I was warned to cover up thoroughly to prevent ticks finding bare skin, and our  host threatened us with daily tick inspections. We had a huge cooked  breakfast as it was going to be a long day.

It was pretty mild weather and mercifully dry. I was prepared for all weathers and my jacket had many pockets - I had a fur hat, red leather gloves and sunglasses. I was advised to take a book as there might be long periods lying in the grass waiting for the stalk to conclude; sometimes it didn’t . I packed a small paperback called, “ Hunted Priest” a true story set in the Reformation.

We started our walk in single file with our sticks. The stalker led the party followed by the man whose turn it was to shoot a stag - my husband in this case. It was my first time walking on the vibrant green  spongy “Sphagnum” moss. Our host explained that this bog moss had antiseptic properties which helped heal deer wounds. 

Every so often we came to a halt and had to crouch low on the ground, and keep dead silent while the stalker went to spy a  potential beast. This happened a few times until eventually a suitable stag was spotted - that is - either an old stag or a ‘switch’. ‘Switches’ are the most dangerous stags as they have lethal antlers, which resemble spears rather than the usual branch of little antlers. This means that in a stag fight, the ‘switch’ can use  its spear to stab its rival and swiftly kill it. 

After about 3 miles of stalking, a suitable stag was spotted and we all got into lying positions, while the stalker with the rifle, and my husband left the party to find a closer spot to shoot the stag. They crawled as quietly as possible lest the beast get away. We all waited for some time until we heard a single gun shot. This was no guarantee that the stag was shot, so we had to wait until further news.

No further shots were heard and my happy husband had successfully shot a ‘switch’. As it was his first stag he got bloodied on the face, which is an old tradition. The stalker then  gralloched it  and an Argocat vehicle appeared, to take the beast, using GPS technology, to the larder - where the carcass would be  prepared for sale, the antlers removed, so that they could be mounted and hung up in our house. The beast weighed 13 stone and although ‘switches’ don’t have the  most attractive antlers, my husband wanted them as it was his first stag. The used brass cartridge case would be turned into a key ring. Some people make collages out of the cartridge cases.

We walked a further 3 miles to a wooden cabin, where we had our ‘pieces’ for lunch. On our return there was another stalk and another stag. The day’s quota for stags was reached and we all looked forward to getting back to the lovely cosy lodge and hot baths! We walked a total of 12 miles that day and my thighs were burning.

I was so relieved to be able to relax in the panelled sitting room, with the cosy tartan carpet and open fire and a glass of wine. The walls were etched with old signatures including some famous ones such as the Duke of Wellington, the Dukes of Sutherland and Sir Winston Churchill. On the table were tempting boxes of Bendicks Bittermints, Quality Street and proper fudge.

Supper was fresh lobster delivered by the postman, followed by our friend’s wife’s delicately sliced oranges in Grand Marnier with  cream, and after post dinner drinks, I sank into my soft bed and slept deeply. It had been a gloriously sunny day for my first time on a stalk, the first of many.

Teenage parties - some advice!

 Our youngest son had finished his GCSEs and he asked us vaguely if he could hold a party to celebrate the end of the exams. This was unusual as he doesn't really go in for parties, not even on his birthdays for the last few years. 

We said - fine, but for around 10, especially if they were staying all night.

No date was given so we assumed he had changed his mind about hosting  a party.

Then he gave us a few days notice of a party - so we braced ourselves and said fine - we asked him how many were coming.

He asked if 25 people could come.

We took a deep breath and said OK. We have an annexe so the party would be held there and the swimming pool would be available plus tennis court. One of us would need to sit by the pool most of the night for obvious reasons.

We took him shopping to get food and drinks - my husband was looking for low alcoholic beers, in cans, as glass bottles would no doubt be dropped and broken glass everywhere. We had the same approach for the soft drinks - only canned or plastic bottles. 

We decided to get carbohydrate rich food as we were warned that they would smuggle in Vodka and therefore they needed bready type food - we got a selection of pizzas, bread stick, crisps, cooked chicken jointed up, sausages, new potatoes, doughnuts, flapjacks, chocolate torte and mars bars. Some of the teenagers brought food too.

I deliberately removed any valuable items from the annexe and supplied old bedding and sleeping bags - stuff which didn't matter if it got ruined. We requested those who had tents to bring them as they could sleep in the garden - some did bring tents and sleeping bags.

On the day of the party the first guests arrived at 5.30 - a bit early we thought. Then many more arrived and our son started to lose count of who was coming - and who was staying.

The party was going well and it was still in full swing at 11pm, when some parents came to collect their children. By midnight it was still going and a lot of noisy shouting teenagers were in full throttle.

A boy jumped in the pool with his clothes on - so that was interesting. 

By 3am it was still in full flow and my husband had to go and tell them off as we were worried about neighbours hearing it - luckily we are rural and not surrounded by houses, but even so, noise carries.

Our son was on duty all night - poor boy had just had braces fitted on that day so he couldn't eat. He's not a drinker either.

We went to bed at 3 and hoped they were all going to sleep, but I woke up quite soon after as I heard noises downstairs and I had a feeling someone was looking for alcohol, so I went down and called out my son's name and whoever it was fled.

Then I went back to bed and a whole hoard of teenagers were trying to get into the main house so I called down and told them to go to the annexe.

They obeyed and went to the annexe, and then our son came to the house with 2 friends, so as I knew one of them I allowed them in and put them in the 2 spare rooms.

The next morning I was shocked at the state of the annexe -  the carpet had beer spilt all over it - there was broken glass as they had found glasses in the cupboards, and we found empty Vodka bottles - one was carefully placed in a drawer! The odd cigarette but was also in one of the bedrooms but this generation don't seem to smoke ciggies - there were some roll up papers so we assume there was a bit of whacky backie going on.

So the tips are - make sure you know who is coming - as you can lose control - especially if you have a pool. An adult needs to supervise the pool area.

Don't have glasses around - don't have valuables around - don't supply spirits or wine - they will smuggle those in anyway. Hide your drinks cupboard.

Have plenty of carb rich food and enough for breakfasts.

Make sure any bedding is old and you don't mind binning it - including pillows and duvets - make sure the mattresses are protected as they spill drink on them. Remove any valuable rugs too. A first aid kit is important. Have some adult support if you can - 2 as a minimum and prepared to stay up all night. You need to be seen to be around for emergencies.

I still don't know how many came but we think about 30 in the end - and half or more stayed, as their parents were unable to collect them.

Just hope it's a one-off!

Some Marriage Statistics

 The Coalition for Marriage has some startling statistics about the number of lovers  prior to marriage, and divorce rates

Dr Patrick Fagan served under the first Bush Presidency and is Director of MARRI (Marriage and Religion Research Institute).

According to Dr Fagan's studies, if a woman has one lover her chances of staying married after 5 years are 95%.

If a woman has 2 lovers  prior to marriage, this drops to  62% of staying married after 5 years.

If a woman has many lovers  before marriage, the chances of staying married are 50%. 

A man who has  5 lovers prior to marriage reaches  the same statistics as a woman who has 2 lovers.

An A to Z of femininity

 Women and girls - embrace your femininity! - God made 2 genders and that is all. 

I have compiled an A-Z of feminine things

A is for A-line dresses and skirts. This is a feminine shape as it emphasises the natural waistline of the female form. It is called A-line as the skirt flares out and resembles the letter A.

A is for Saint Anne - the mother of Mary - Mother of God.

B is for bashful - a feminine trait of not drawing undue attention onto oneself.

B is for blouse - a feminine top with short or long sleeves in a soft material and often gathers at the top of the shoulders giving a softer shape.

B is for bow - a feminine shape with many uses, from embellishments on clothes to scarves etc.

B is for Broderie Anglaise - a type of cotton with embroidery

B is for brooch - so many uses! you can wear brooches on jackets, hats and handbags. Pick them up in charity shops for a few pounds.

B is for bonnet - a type of hat covering the back, top and sides of the head, which is secured using 2 ties under the chin - great for baby girls.

B is for bra - vital to get properly fitted every 6-9 months

B is for ballet - better than the gym

C is for curvy. Think of the opposite of straight lines

C is for chiffon - a soft material

C is for custody of the eyes. Watching or reading rude films and books harm the soul, as the impure images stay in your head forever.

D is for doelike 

D is for demeure 

D is for delicate

D is for dainty

D is for dulcet

D is for dress

D is for Dirndl skirt - this has a gathered waistline

E is for empathetic

E is for Saint Elizabeth - cousin of Mary, Mother of God.

E is for engagement ring 

E is for eternity ring

F is for fluffy

F is for frill

F is for flowery

F is for floral

F is for floaty

F is for flowing

F is for feathery hats

F is for flesh - you want people to focus on your face and not swathes of flesh

G is for graceful

G is for gazelle-like

G is for gentle

G is for glittery

G is for girl

H is for headscarf

H is for heart motifs

H is for helpful

H is for hair slides and ties - so much choice from sparkly to pearly!

H is for head covering

H is for hourglass figure

H is for hair - medium to long is more feminine than shorter styles

H is for heels - even a small heel is more feminine than flats. If flat shoes are unavoidable get them in feminine colours/patterns

H is for headband

I is for intuitive

I is for intriguing

J is for Josephine - the female version of St Joseph

J is for jewellery

K is for kitten heels

K is for Katherine

K is for knickers - get ones that go up to the waist or you risk having a little roll of flesh if too low down. Cotton is best for summer, synthetic fine for winter.

L is for lace/lacy material

L is for Lucy

L is for lilac - a pastel colour

L is for ladylike

L is for lipstick/lipgloss. If you have no time to put make up on, lipstick is the quickest and easiest instant ‘perk up’

L is for legs - sit with knees together and not open, which is very unattractive and coarse. Hairy legs are unattractive on women

M is for marshmallow

M is for Mary

M is for mantilla - a lace head covering worn in Catholic and Orthodox churches

M is for modesty - the opposite of tarty

M is for make-up (don't over-do it or it looks gaudy and tasteless)

M is for mother. Children are a gift from God and must have the right to be born

N is for nimble

N is for Nancy

N is for Natalie

N is for No swear words - very coarse and unfeminine

N is for nighty/nightdress

O is for St Olga of Kiev

O is for Our Lady, the Mother of God

P is for pinafore

P is for petticoat

P is for polka dots

P is for puffed sleeves

P is for pretty

P is for pink

P is for pastel colours

P is for pearls

P is for princess

Q is for queen

R is for ruffles

R is for rosy

R is for ribbon

R is for rampant feminism - a swear word. And definitely not feminine 

S is for skirt

S is for stilettos

S is for soft

S is for sparkly

S is for silky material

S is for sweet ( temperament)

S is for sugary

S is for satin

S is for swishy skirt - a long skirt that moves

S is for sobriety. There is something very unattractive about drunkenness - it can lead to coarse and unfeminine behaviour. A small glass of red wine with a meal is fine and has health benefits. Any more and it is bad for you.

T is for tender

T is for tiered-dress/skirt

T is for tights

T is for tiara

U is for St Ursula

V is for velvet/y

V is for veil (wedding veil)

V is for voile material

V is for velour - a stretchy velvet

V is for virgin - save yourself for your future husband if you have a vocation to marriage. Marriage statistics show that if a woman has more than 1 sexual partner, her chances of getting divorced are much higher than the woman who saves herself for her husband. See Coalition for Marriage.

W is for woman. God took a rib from man (Adam) to make woman (Eve). 

W is for wavy lines

W is for willowy

W is for Wilma

W is for “walking tall” - that means holding your head up and not slouching

W is for wife

X is for Xaviera - the female version of Xavier

Y is for Yvette

Z is for St Zoe

Z is for St Zita

If you have extra suggestions please contact me and I will add them if appropriate

Addictions Counselling

 I highly recommend addictions counsellor Siân Oram.

Siân has an MSc in Addiction Psychology & Counselling. She is a member of FDAP.

Siân speaks English, and is  fluent in Spanish.

Based in Dorking in Surrey,  Siân offers counselling via online and telephone.

All details are on her website

Her website is

Arcadia Therapy